Love Dinner Reboot
Dec 22, 2023
Ten years ago, I started hosting an event called Love Dinner. I didn't really know what it was for at the time, other than I was in a new town and feeling lonely.
It felt like kind of a holy idea.
Perhaps, if I'm feeling lonely and disconnected, others are too. So, I called a few women I'd met on a trip to Southern Africa, and invited them to my house for dinner. I made something tasty, got a few bottles of wine, lit some candles, and let 'er rip.
In the ten years since, that little event has grown way past my dinner table - to different cities, different countries even to a hospital ship in Africa. It's an exercise in my flagship course The Meaning of Midlife, and people will frequently request a Love Dinner from their host if one hasn't happened in a while.
Here's what I believe:
The days of using willpower to stay emotionally healthy are over. If mental health statistics are an indication, our cultural obesssion with independence, competition and our big, sexy bootstraps has failed.
We must go a different direction while linking arms with our neighbors again, and not just those who think, vote and live like we do. Love Dinner is about belonging and solidarity as opposed to isolation, self-protection and boredom.
People are attracted to strong communities, when they feel they belong, and it doesn't matter what the central topic is - as evidenced by the ongoing popularity of cult membership.
Humans know we are safer, better and happier in groups, and that's why excommunication from a church or cult is so painful. It sucks to lose your people - flawed as they are - and be forced back into the world alone.
But many people right now have zero social fabric, and in my opinion that's one reason for our rampant anxiety. What if I get sick or hurt? Who will come?
Love Dinner is built to counter that, to begin weaving people of all shapes, colors and sizes back together. We're doing one in my neighborhood in two weeks and several people have already told me they're pretty excited about it.
Which confirms my suspicion that if we focus on building positive communities again - where nothing is being pitched or sold, and people aren't being manipulated or controlled in any way - we may begin to weave ourselves into better fabric, something the majority of American culture has clearly lost the ability to do.
It's so simple.
People + Dinner + Time = Community.
Let's go.
ps. The Love Dinner in the picture was held at the 2021 Pensacola Firegirl Retreat. We had a different table host every night for practice! If you want to do one yourself and could use a little framework, DM me and I'll send it to you. Or if you're in Pensacola and want to come to mine, LMK and I'll send you the info.
pps. If it’s time to do more things like Love Dinner to get out of your rut and move into community and purpose, we can help! Book a free call with us here!
